How to be Happy (Philosophical Theories) (Melody)
Sometimes, it can be hard to feel happy. Life is so complicated, filled with different stressors and challenges all packed into one, that we can’t help but feel overwhelmed sometimes, or all the time. To many, finding true happiness is the very purpose of life; the crux of existence; what all our efforts essentially go to.
But how do we go about finding this arbitrary emotion that other people have defined? What does it even mean to be happy? Some say being happy means being content with what you have. Some say being happy means finding people to be happy with. Some say being happy means being successful (which has many more interpretations of it as well).
But the question here today isn’t what happiness means — it’s how to find it. And you might ask, how are we supposed to find happiness if we don’t know what it means. So then I implore you to make your own definition of happiness. When do you feel like the best version of yourself? — is that when you achieved something? When you’re relaxed? When you’re with friends? Your answer will be very different from someone else’s answer, so obviously, your definition of happiness will be very different as well. But throughout life, perhaps we are on a quest to not only achieve happiness, but to define it within our experiences and our expectations, and then to achieve the ideal that we set for ourselves. That feels a lot more reasonable than conforming to someone else’s idea of happiness. And perhaps that’s a bit existentialist. But today, we’re going to explore two different ways to “find” happiness or more vaguely, to feel better, so we can help you discover and cement your own version of happiness.
Buddhism — starting off with a classic:
Buddhism believes that happiness can be attained through compassion and self-reflection. It also believes that once we view the natural world without any of our preimposed filters, we will be able to see the truest versions of the world as well as ourselves, and being at peace with it is in itself a version of acceptance and happiness. Buddhism believes in rejecting materialistic pleasures, doing good deeds for others, and focusing on ourselves and our own self-growth. Here are some overall tips for happiness (there are, of course, a lot more, but these were the ones I liked):
Do one kind thing a day — this will increase your karma as well as spread good into the world
Meditate everyday — this will increase your well being and help you focus on the present as well as calm your body
Appreciate everyday — this connects with mindfulness as it helps you stay focused and feel grateful for the present
Forgive yourself and others — this will help you move on from the past and focus on the future as well as where you can grow
Be positive — positivity and happiness are strongly correlated and positivity will help you feel better in general
Have faith in yourself and the world — this is a given; if you don’t believe in yourself, how can you believe in your ability to find happiness?
Hedonism — the avoidance of pain:
Hedonism follows the belief that happiness is attained when one minimizes pain and maximizes pleasure. It recommends that we engage in actions — such as eating food — that bring us joy. However, it does disregard the fact that eating good food and let’s say if our goal was losing weight, might clash, and doesn’t take into account our long term happiness. However, hedonism is an “objective happiness” indicator, not a sort of cumulative feel-good happiness. It is, to put it mathematically, the “happiness” score of an accumulation of our statements that correspond to actions we have performed or were performed onto us. But we can nevertheless learn from it. Hedonism tells us also to value pleasure over pain. It is true though that temporary pain might be long-term pleasure, so we have to keep out of that. We shouldn’t choose not to workout at all because it might be difficult, since working out consistently will lead to a better life. Here are still a few small tips that I’ve gathered from hedonism.
Appreciate the little things — if the small things in our lives that we previously disregarded begin bringing us pleasure, then they will increase our objective happiness.
Take more breaks — breaks are a momentary pleasure and helpful for our overall well being and focus
Avoid harmful behavior — this can include eating too many sweets or watching TV all day, because after a while, your tenth chocolate or tenth episode in one sitting will become more pain than pleasure
Choose to feel pleasure instead of pain — this might be a bit of a loophole, but if we choose to feel “pleasure” from a bad event and learn from it instead of “pain”, our overall “happiness index” and more importantly, wellbeing, will nevertheless increase. So if we fail a test, but instead of feeling pain from it, feel pleasure at the opportunity to learn (which is hopeful thinking), then we will be a lot more happies.
Although there are only two main philosophies/religions above, we can still learn a lot from both of them. I hope these summaries and tips have helped you discover how to be a bit happier in your life, and maybe they have even helped shape your definition of what happiness is, but if not, don’t worry, I don’t really understand what it means to be “happy” either.
If you want to make yourself happier, try volunteering with Letters Against Depression. If you want a note to feel better, sign up to receive a letter at lettersagainst.org.